Heart rate monitors

today i went to the oral surgeon to get two of my wisdom teeth pulled out.

the one at the bottom left part of my jaw was a liiiiittttlllee crooked. so they decided to pull the one on top as well, probably just for kicks.

so i get there today, and they sit me in this room facing a window that looks out onto the street. at once i see a truck covered in mud and want to go off roading

second, they tell me i'll be knocked out (not to be confused with knocked up) using an I.V. drip. i start laughing hysterically. dont know why. i guess its always been my response to anything medical related that freaks me out.

so i'm just giggling away while she is putting little heart rate things on my wrists and arms. i notice at once that everything i do effects the heart rate monitor on the wall that looked like this

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so i squeeze my hand and it beeps. oh and btw, my resting heartrate is below 40bpm. when your heart rate drops below 43 on this machine, it considers you dead i guess, so lets just say the nurse was getting pissed at me cuz she had to keep resetting the machine. average american resting heart rate is 70bpm

to keep my heart rate up, and my mind off the enevitable, i played songs on the heart rate monitor by squeezing my hand to a beat in my head

thank you queen for blessing my life with "another one bites the dust"

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as i was in mid-jam the doctor came in and told me to pretty much knock it off. i started back up the giggles when he started talking needles. he gave me a frustrated look, shoved it in my arm and told me that i better have a good dream ready

the next thing i remember (as i'm trying to recall, i'm starting to laugh again) my mom and the nurse were helping me to the car.

wierdest event of my life

now i'm watching spaceballs and eating my favorite kind of ice cream that looks alot like the food from "hook"

and i have no idea why random words in this blog are highlighted yellow


Randy said...

you know i am almost happy to hear your teeth got pulled. Not because of the pain that i hope you are feeling... did i say hope or hope not. Oh well never-the-less, i got your ties so i hope you are happy. Maybe next time you will bring your jeep so we can see it go over a hill.

Courtney said...

ohhh crap, why have I missed this? This is stinking FUNNY! I laughed out loud as I read this!